It's been literally over a year since I have created a post on blogger. So before I start, I'm gona update on a few things. The last time I created a post I was in my senior year at Roy H Mann. It was a crazy and emotional year full of lots a suprises and learned lessons. It was an emotional journey and some of those things still haunt me today. But I'm gradually getting over them, I just know it's going to need to take some time. Now I am in my freshmen year at the High School for Global Citizenship. So far it's been kinda sketchy, and the school is really mixy. It's kinda wierd because I expected to have tons of friends and fit in perfectly with a group o friends, but so far, I relaly only have one friend that I can talk to. Well make that 3, lol. I'm starting to find my place, but I'm not really there yet. I miss my friends from Roy Mann SO much! Especially my best friend, I thought that life would be simple being apart, all we needed to do was to keep in touch and see each other often, but now im starting to see that holding a long distance friendhsip together is harer than it seems. It's hard knowing that the friendship is fading slowly, but all we can do is find a way to mend it. Anywho I miss alot of other poepl too and all of the memories that we shared. Those were a good 3 years of my life at that school, but now a new chapter is starting in my life. High school is very wild, alot of permiscuoisity (fail) and alot of fights. It's hard trying to fit in because there are soo many groups. You got the spanish kids, the haitian kids, the jamaican kids, the smart kids, the gang bangers, the weed heads, the ghetto kids, the "wanabe barbies", the "wanabe cool kids" and then there's me, the normal one. This school is worst than I thought, but I guess there is nothing else I can really do. The only reason why I'm staying is because it provides lots of opportunities as far as college and a future and jobs etc etc. But school is not what I came here to blog about, it is the one thing I mostly blog about, and that is LOVE! Love is sooo powerful, and it hit me pretty hard these first couple of months of hs. I swore to myself that I wouldn't get hurt anymore but what do I go and do? Hurt myself. How can you be friends with someone when 1) You still have feelings for them 2)The person has denied their feelings for you when they have told you CONSTANTLY how much they love, how much they care about you, and 3)they have gotten into a relationship with someone new. It hurts me all the time to see them together, and I'm working on getting over it, but it's really hard. I love the kid, he's a really good frend, but I saw myself being with him,and now I have to be a witness of him making out with some other girl? Like okay I get that feelings come and go, but dont tell me you love me one day and then go out with someone the next day. My heart fell to my feet when I found out. And he didnt even tell me straight forward. Wanna know how I found out? Facebook....FACEBOOK! Like come on really? If you have feelings for someone else TELL ME! I'm not gona curse you out and kick you out of my life. Just being a man and respecting my feelings is all that I wanted. Smh I have nothing against the girl but...somethings fishy. I am NOT jumping to conclusions, I'm just going by obeservations, thats it. But like I say KARMA is KARMA. And what goes around, comes around. It'll all take some time and I will have a last laugh...Anyways I'm on rambling mode now. So im gona end the post here nd save some of this drama for another post. Later blogger world!
-Taylor xoxo
No comments:
Post a Comment